Archive for ◊ August, 2010 ◊

Jokes about Obama
Tuesday, August 31st, 2010 | Author:

For nearly two years, the major comedians have almost totally shied away from making fun of Obama…   Well that’s finally starting to change.  At the Big Hollywood site, there is an interesting article as well as a list of jokes:

“What is the difference between Osama Bin Laden and Barack Hussein Obama?  One is an anti-capitalist who hates America and wants to destroy Israel, and the other is hiding in Afghanistan.”  –Mark Klein

“All during his campaign, Obama’s claim to fame was that he was a community organizer on the South Side of Chicago. I was just on the South Side of Chicago – it ain’t too organized.”  –Drew Hastings

“The new Obama economy game show: “American Idle.” –Sam Griesbaum

“If we could harness the wind generated by Obama’s ears and mouth we would have energy independence!”  –Jeff Jena

“People were once comparing him (Obama) to Jesus Christ. On the economy he seems more like Moses; wandering around aimlessly, blaming everything on the Bush.” –Tim Slagle

“If you cast a ballot for Barack Obama are you voting Democrat or Demigod?” –Gregory Peterson

“He is called ‘Vice President Biden’ because the phrase “hot air balloon” was already taken.”  –Mark Klein

“Obama inspired class envy: The original green job.”  –Sam Griesbaum

Q. Why is Barack Obama running for office as a Democrat?
A. The Communist Party didn’t have enough voters.  –Author Unknown

“In reaction to Iran launching a new missile and starting a nuclear reactor, President Obama is going to ratchet up the pressure. This time he is sending them a very strongly worded letter.”  –Jeff Jena

Obama puts the “dip” in Diplomacy.  –Sam Griesbaum

“Obama would have had an opinion on the gulf oil spill earlier but his prompter was in the shop.” –Jeff Jena

 ”President Obama announced $118 million in stimulus monies to increase high-speed Internet in Ohio. Presumably, so he can get all the bad news to us faster.”  –Drew Hastings

McDonalds has announced an addition to its menu: the Obama Happy Meal!   You order whatever you want to order off the menu and the guy standing behind you is forced to pay for it!

Why doesn’t President Obama go to church? Because his place of worship is a mirror.

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2010 Tolerance Award
Monday, August 30th, 2010 | Author:

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The Most Interesting Man in the World
Sunday, August 29th, 2010 | Author:

Who would have thought that the actor that plays “The Most Interesting Man in the World” on those Dos Equis beer commercials…  is a 72 year old Jewish conservative living in California?

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If you’ve seen the commercial, you’ve heard the narrator exclaim: “He once had an awkward moment just to see how it feels. He lives vicariously through himself.”

Well, My buddy, Rudy Rudner, came back with a good one just for this occassion: “He once fathered 9 sons, just so he could have his own minyan.”

Category: Business, Humor  | Leave a Comment
Back at Kings Island
Saturday, August 28th, 2010 | Author:

I hadn’t been to Kings Island amusement park for over ten years… until they came out with the end-of-year $30 special…  A photo of Miss and Bear after the water ride.

Miss and bear after water ride

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Spending Your Way to Prosperity
Saturday, August 28th, 2010 | Author:

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Polling America
Friday, August 27th, 2010 | Author:

A great article in the Wall Street Journal about “uber-poller” Scott Rasmussen… and interesting approach he takes:

…a significant division among the American public that he has tracked for the past few years—a division between what he calls the Mainstream Public and the Political Class.

To figure out where people are, he asks three questions: Whose judgment do you trust more: that of the American people or America’s political leaders? Has the federal government become its own special interest group? Do government and big business often work together in ways that hurt consumers and investors? Those who identify with the government on two or more questions are defined as the political class.

Five Surgeons
Thursday, August 26th, 2010 | Author:

Five surgeons are discussing the best patients on which to operate.

The first surgeon says, ‘I like to see Accountants on my operating table because when you open them up, everything inside is numbered.’

The second responds, ‘Yeah, but you should try Electricians! Everything inside them is color-coded.’

The third surgeon says, ‘No, I really think Librarians are the best; everything inside them is in alphabetical order.’

The fourth surgeon chimes in, ‘You know I like Construction Workers. Those guys always understand when you have a few parts left over at the end, and when the job takes longer than you said it would.’

The fifth surgeon shut them all up when he observed, ‘You’re all wrong. Politicians are the easiest to operate on. There’s no guts, no heart, no balls, no brains, and no spine, and there are only two moving parts – the mouth and the asshole – and they are interchangeable.’

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Support for Religous Freedom
Wednesday, August 25th, 2010 | Author:

An interesting view

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5 Fun Test Questions
Tuesday, August 24th, 2010 | Author:

Excerpted from StrangeCosmos:

Questions:
1. A lady read a book, turned the light out and went to sleep. In the morning, when she saw in the newspaper that a ship had sunk drowning all on board, she committed suicide. Why?

2. A young man entered a bar and asked for a glass of water. The person behind the bar produced a gun and pointed it at the man. He replied, “Thank you,” and walked off. Why?

3. Imagine you are driving a Mercedes at 100 mph. The steering locks. The doors lock. The brakes fail. You can’t get out! You’re heading for a 1,000 foot cliff! What do you do?

4. 2 + 2 + 5 = 247. Add one small line to make the sum correct.

5. A man on horseback went on a two day trip. He left on Tuesday and arrived home on Tuesday. How could this be?

Answers:
1. She was a lighthouse keeper.
2. He had the hiccups.
3. You stop “imagining.”
4. Put a line on the first “+,” from the top left, making it into a “4.” 2 4 2 + 5 = 247
5. The name of the horse was “Tuesday.”

Job Aspirations
Monday, August 23rd, 2010 | Author:

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