1. My mother taught me TO APPRECIATE A JOB WELL DONE:
“If you’re going to kill each other, do it outside — I just finished cleaning!”
2. My mother taught me RELIGION:
“You better pray that will come out of the carpet.”
3. My mother taught me about TIME TRAVEL:
“If you don’t straighten up, I’m going to knock you into the middle of next week!”
4. My mother taught me LOGIC:
“Because I said so, that’s why!”
5. My mother taught me FORESIGHT:
“Be sure you wear clean underwear in case you’re in an accident.”
6. My mother taught me IRONY:
“Keep laughing and I’ll give you something to cry about.”
7. My mother taught me about OSMOSIS:
“Shut your mouth and eat your supper!”
8. My mother taught me about CONTORTIONISM:
“Will you look at the dirt on the back of your neck!”
9. My mother taught me about STAMINA:
“You’ll sit there ’til all that spinach is finished.”
10. My mother taught me about WEATHER:
“It looks as if a tornado swept through your room.”