Another humorous list from StrageCosmos:
1. When your girlfriend really needed to talk to you during the game, she’d appear in a little box in the corner of the screen during a time-out.
2. Each year, your raise would be pegged to the fortunes of the NBA team of your choice.
3. The funniest guy in the office would get to be CEO.
4. An acceptable excuse for tardiness would be “Sorry I’m late, but I got really wasted last night”.
5. Instead of beer belly, you’d get “beer biceps.”
6. Valentine’s Day would be moved to February 29th so it would only occur in leap years.
7. The only show opposite “Monday Night Football” would be “Monday Night Basketball”.
8. Women suffering from PMS would be required to wear a burka.
9. Gun racks would be standard on all American cars.
10. There would be a device that automatically raised and lowered toilet seats.