Weird things people put on their job applications (from actual resumes, cover letters, and applications):
“I am extremely loyal to my present firm, so please don’t let them know of my immediate availability.”
“I intentionally omitted my salary history. I’ve made money and lost money. I’ve been rich and I’ve been poor. I prefer being rich.”
“Please don’t misconstrue my 14 jobs as ‘job-hopping’. I have never quit a job.”
Reason for Leaving Last Job: “The Company made me a scapegoat – just like my three previous employers.”
“Please call me after 5:30 because I am self-employed and my employer does not know I am looking for another job.”